Hollywood can kiss my A$$

Why did the big suits in the entertainment industry decide to rape my childhood for film ideas? And furthermore, why do they feel it is necessary to re-make a perfectly good film that was only released 2 years ago?

It's because they all think we're stupid and like to play to the lowest common denominator! I have said that before and I say it again!

I will give props to a few of those who have delivered in their promises of good entertainment like Star Trek and Transformers, but the LOTL movie? I am terrified to see GI Joe, and I hope it doesn't fall into line with other flops of yore like Dukes of Hazard and Bewitched. I was shocked to see that they're now going to brutally rape another childhood gem, Flight of the Navigator! And, today, I heard something even more repugnant: they are re-making Frank Oz' Death at a Funeral!

What's Death at a Funeral? Probably one of the funniest films to be released in a long time. The original 2007 release was done in a way that echoes the styles of Monty Python. It is a clever, well-written, and VERY WELL DIRECTED ensemble film that showcases great British actors that no one has ever heard of. The 2 Americans in the film are also brilliant and have a big cult following themselves. They also happen to play 2 of the most over-the-top characters that you've ever seen on the big screen. These men; Peter Dinklage and Alan Tudyk, show the audience what it means to be fucked up beyond all recognition, and it's AWESOME. They also play British very well, and had ME fooled until I looked them up on Wikipedia.

So, WHY THE HELL DO THE HOLLYWOOD EXECS WANT TO FUCK WITH A GOOD THING? They cast a bunch of big names including Chris Rock (I don't even know where the hell he'd fit into the damn movie - it's not his style of comedy) to draw a bigger audience. WHY DO THEY DO THIS? Why can't they just do a re-release of the original if they want more people to see it? Re-cut a few commercials to make it less "artsy?" Not to mention, they replaced the director, the legend, Frank Oz with Neil LaBute. I am sure Mr. LaBute is a fine director but THIS IS OZ' BABY! THEY'RE GONNA RAPE IT! THE DINGO ATE YODA'S BABY!!!!! ARRRRRRRRRGGHHHH!

I know, I know, the arts aren't ABOUT art anymore - just about making a buck. But if they want a powerhouse ensemble comedy out there with big name celebs, or a new family-friendly sci-fi adventure, WHY DON'T PEOPLE GET OFF THEIR ASSES AND WRITE NEW ONES????? Quit raping my childhood and happy memories because you feel the need to make a few more $$$ to add to your already overstuffed wallet! When the new Death at a Funeral and Flight of the Navigator are both released in 2010, do yourself a favor - boycott the new releases and rent the originals via Netflix. I assure you, you'll have a much better time, and save yourself the $100 or however much it costs to go to a movie these days!